It was 3AM. There were bubbles.
Soaring soapy spheres filled the room, or at least my corner of it.
Each breath produced a translucent prism that refracted light in a way that can only be matched by an oil spill at a car wash.
A rainbow of colors shifts and slides around the fragile exoskeleton of the gleaming UFOs.
The larger orbs appeared to be the most impressive to the lookers on. I, however, found the greatest accomplishment to be the capturing of small or medium sized suds for the purpose of breathing larger and more bountiful life into them. A single two inch glob would be transformed into multiple spheres, some of them even larger than the original.
The casual observers contribute coy commentary. They talk not only about the bubbles, but also about the financial state of people on the street, and the socialist implications of the latest blockbuster. Drugs--it has been decided--are not good for you. Each agrees to this proposal, though some only through their sarcastic retorts. We know that toxins alter our perceptions of the world and put everything in a distorted light.
Meanwhile the soaring beacons transfigured the luminescence of our living room lamp into a miniature Aurora Borialis. The peanut gallery gazes upon the bubbles in an entranced accord. The gliding colors enrich our resolve.
It was 3AM, and there were bubbles.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Thursday, April 09, 2009
Reflection And Analysis
This term is coming to a close pretty quickly. I have only two weeks of classes and a few finals. May 2nd I head home.
So what has this term come to? What has been gained? What have I learned?
I've learned that I have a lot of work yet to do in the area of focusing my ideas and thoughts when presenting them to others. Part of it is just a matter of having more time to prepare my thoughts.
I've also had many opportunities to teach this term. It has been scary. BUT at the same time I have seen that--when I am well prepared--I am capable of standing in front of a bunch of students and presenting a lesson without becoming too uncomfortable. Planning, preparation and purpose--with these three things I am able to endure speaking in front of the most unresponsive audience.
My writing has improved. I have a long way to go yet, but with only a few key pieces of information my writing has easily doubled in its potency.
I have grown in my understanding of what I believe, and why I would teach.
I have grown in intelect and understanding. I have grown in my ability to ask questions (though I have only scratched the surface in that respect).
This term has given me a greater respect for myself. There are still so many areas in which I need to improve. So many things about myself I pray for God to change in me. But I have seen myself rise above the distractions to a new level of success, all by God's grace.
I came into this term seeking to work harder than any term previous. I hoped to work above and beyond my capabilities to a point which only God could bring about through me. Excellence was the goal. Not for the sake of excellence or pride, but to build my faith in my God and to present an example of what God is capable.
It was not easy. There were times when I wished I could quit or at least take a break. Yet God continued to provide strength and perseverance.
Only time will show the complete fruit of my labor. Right now, however, I know that this term has been a beneficial experience in many ways.
My gratitude to all those who have encouraged me in my academic endeavors this term.
So what has this term come to? What has been gained? What have I learned?
I've learned that I have a lot of work yet to do in the area of focusing my ideas and thoughts when presenting them to others. Part of it is just a matter of having more time to prepare my thoughts.
I've also had many opportunities to teach this term. It has been scary. BUT at the same time I have seen that--when I am well prepared--I am capable of standing in front of a bunch of students and presenting a lesson without becoming too uncomfortable. Planning, preparation and purpose--with these three things I am able to endure speaking in front of the most unresponsive audience.
My writing has improved. I have a long way to go yet, but with only a few key pieces of information my writing has easily doubled in its potency.
I have grown in my understanding of what I believe, and why I would teach.
I have grown in intelect and understanding. I have grown in my ability to ask questions (though I have only scratched the surface in that respect).
This term has given me a greater respect for myself. There are still so many areas in which I need to improve. So many things about myself I pray for God to change in me. But I have seen myself rise above the distractions to a new level of success, all by God's grace.
I came into this term seeking to work harder than any term previous. I hoped to work above and beyond my capabilities to a point which only God could bring about through me. Excellence was the goal. Not for the sake of excellence or pride, but to build my faith in my God and to present an example of what God is capable.
It was not easy. There were times when I wished I could quit or at least take a break. Yet God continued to provide strength and perseverance.
Only time will show the complete fruit of my labor. Right now, however, I know that this term has been a beneficial experience in many ways.
My gratitude to all those who have encouraged me in my academic endeavors this term.
Wednesday, April 01, 2009
Patience: It Takes Time
It's about time I wrote something...
Maybe when I don't have two large papers due in less than a week.
Maybe when I don't have two large papers due in less than a week.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Portals and Passageways
Doors are interesting things.
Doors say a lot about a culture, a structure, a person.
Doors are used for a variety of purposes. Some protect by keeping out while others protect by keeping in. Some are merely a visual barrier while others permit visibility. Some are always locked, some can be locked, and some never lock. Some swing, some slide, and some flap.
Doors are made of many different materials depending on the purpose and the means available to its designer: Metal, wood, glass, plastic, fiberglass, paper, fabric, rock.
Doors can also instigate emotional responses. Some doors look pleasant, or creepy, or stir memories of childhood. Some bring to mind fairy tales, fantasy worlds, or nightmares. A locked door can be reassuring or it can be deathly frightening. An open door can make you feel welcome or insecure.
Doors also hold a lot of symbolism for us. A closed door can be the end of one possibility, while an open door can be the beginning of a new opportunity. Some symbolize a transition from one way of life to another. A door can symbolize a person's character, or the state of his heart.
Doors are an every day aspect of our lives. We take for granted a great deal about doors both on a conceptual scale and on an individual bases.
What more can be said? Knock knock.
Doors say a lot about a culture, a structure, a person.
Doors are used for a variety of purposes. Some protect by keeping out while others protect by keeping in. Some are merely a visual barrier while others permit visibility. Some are always locked, some can be locked, and some never lock. Some swing, some slide, and some flap.
Doors are made of many different materials depending on the purpose and the means available to its designer: Metal, wood, glass, plastic, fiberglass, paper, fabric, rock.
Doors can also instigate emotional responses. Some doors look pleasant, or creepy, or stir memories of childhood. Some bring to mind fairy tales, fantasy worlds, or nightmares. A locked door can be reassuring or it can be deathly frightening. An open door can make you feel welcome or insecure.
Doors also hold a lot of symbolism for us. A closed door can be the end of one possibility, while an open door can be the beginning of a new opportunity. Some symbolize a transition from one way of life to another. A door can symbolize a person's character, or the state of his heart.
Doors are an every day aspect of our lives. We take for granted a great deal about doors both on a conceptual scale and on an individual bases.
What more can be said? Knock knock.
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Opposing Forces
I've had friends who were choked by the expectations and needs of others.
The hands reaching out in the names of "Love" and "Care" grappling for the throat. With every move toward individuality the hands tighten their grasp, wanting only to keep things as they are. Impulsive reaction causes conformity. Act to please, talk to please, and live to please. The situation does not change.
The ruse is not difficult at first. Surely moments can be found to be one's self away from the grip. This cannot last for long. Things will change. Right?
No. Identity is formed in the mold of hands clasped tight. Life goes on dying. Conformity is accepted. This is the way things are.
Time becomes restless. At the least relaxation of the knuckle, drastic release is found. Change. Find Change! Where is it? All of it. Any of it. RUN!
Who is this? Do I know you? I remember you, but something is different; something the size of everything.
"Love" only wanted to keep safe. Was "Care" not trying to protect? Each holding tight to comfort and defend. Now one is left far away and the other right behind. Both reaching; believing they give.
Far gone. Lost in the abyss of freedom. Staying away from hands. Hands hurt. Love? Love cuts and scars. Care? Care comes with a great price. Nothing good is free, and there is nothing left to give. What can be had for nothing? This looks good.
The hands reaching out in the names of "Love" and "Care" grappling for the throat. With every move toward individuality the hands tighten their grasp, wanting only to keep things as they are. Impulsive reaction causes conformity. Act to please, talk to please, and live to please. The situation does not change.
The ruse is not difficult at first. Surely moments can be found to be one's self away from the grip. This cannot last for long. Things will change. Right?
No. Identity is formed in the mold of hands clasped tight. Life goes on dying. Conformity is accepted. This is the way things are.
Time becomes restless. At the least relaxation of the knuckle, drastic release is found. Change. Find Change! Where is it? All of it. Any of it. RUN!
Who is this? Do I know you? I remember you, but something is different; something the size of everything.
"Love" only wanted to keep safe. Was "Care" not trying to protect? Each holding tight to comfort and defend. Now one is left far away and the other right behind. Both reaching; believing they give.
Far gone. Lost in the abyss of freedom. Staying away from hands. Hands hurt. Love? Love cuts and scars. Care? Care comes with a great price. Nothing good is free, and there is nothing left to give. What can be had for nothing? This looks good.
Saturday, December 06, 2008
God's Love...Priceless
Well, that settles it. I finished my last day of classes for this term. All I have left is finals. These finals will determine the actual resting place of my grades for the term, but for the most part everything is already determined.
I made it. Everything didn't fall apart. I'm still alive, and all the projects are done. All the assignments are completed. I wouldn't say that relief rushed over me like an ocean swell. Instead I would describe it as sitting down in a comfortable chair with my feet propped up in front of a warm fire and sipping from a delicious mug of hot chocolate. It feels so good, and it has been a long time coming.
Yes, there is still a lot to do before the term is completely over and I can go home. There are finals to take. There are performances yet to come. In the midst of that, however, I can't help but see all that God has guided me through these last few months and melt in amazement and wonder at His power, planning and patience in my life.
A lot of times we talk about God's love and we describe it by talking about how He saved us from sin and death. This is a great example. Jesus even said that the greatest form of love would drive a person to go as far as to give up his life for a friend. (Which brings up another point of how great God's love is that He would lay down His life for people who were his enemies.) But I think we sometimes forget that God's love extends far beyond a salvation experience.
Our God didn't just die to give us a "get out of jail free" card and send us on our way until we die and end up at his gates. We have a God who cares about every aspect of our lives. We have a God who is concerned with our futures (not just the ultimate future of heaven or hell). This God cares about our worries and our struggles. He wants us to be successful in this life.
"Wait a minute! Did he just say that? Isn't this the guy who wrote a paper on the heresy of the name-it-and-claim-it gospel?" When I say that God wants us to be successful I don't mean it in the way the world measures success. I mean that God wants us to be able to come to the end of our lives on this earth having fought the good fight and triumphed.
Got wants us to be successful, and he knows that for us to be successful in this life we must be completely dependent on Him. That's why He can't just hand us success on a silver platter. He has to give us opportunity to see the potential for failure so that we will understand the power of His provision.
God has done so much for me over the years. I'm sure there is a lot of His work that I may never even know about, but there is so much that I have seen Him do. This term is no exception. There is no reason why everything should have happened as well as it did. None of it makes sense. Yet it happened. It all came together in a way that I could never plan.
Only He could have done it all. But why? Why would He do all that for me? I can tell you straight out, it isn't because I am anyone of particular importance. I am no perfect person or sinless saint. I made plenty of mistakes this term. All I can figure is that God wants me to be here, and He knows that I am incapable of success on my own. He loves me, and wants me to learn to trust Him at all time for all things.
I made it. Everything didn't fall apart. I'm still alive, and all the projects are done. All the assignments are completed. I wouldn't say that relief rushed over me like an ocean swell. Instead I would describe it as sitting down in a comfortable chair with my feet propped up in front of a warm fire and sipping from a delicious mug of hot chocolate. It feels so good, and it has been a long time coming.
Yes, there is still a lot to do before the term is completely over and I can go home. There are finals to take. There are performances yet to come. In the midst of that, however, I can't help but see all that God has guided me through these last few months and melt in amazement and wonder at His power, planning and patience in my life.
A lot of times we talk about God's love and we describe it by talking about how He saved us from sin and death. This is a great example. Jesus even said that the greatest form of love would drive a person to go as far as to give up his life for a friend. (Which brings up another point of how great God's love is that He would lay down His life for people who were his enemies.) But I think we sometimes forget that God's love extends far beyond a salvation experience.
Our God didn't just die to give us a "get out of jail free" card and send us on our way until we die and end up at his gates. We have a God who cares about every aspect of our lives. We have a God who is concerned with our futures (not just the ultimate future of heaven or hell). This God cares about our worries and our struggles. He wants us to be successful in this life.
"Wait a minute! Did he just say that? Isn't this the guy who wrote a paper on the heresy of the name-it-and-claim-it gospel?" When I say that God wants us to be successful I don't mean it in the way the world measures success. I mean that God wants us to be able to come to the end of our lives on this earth having fought the good fight and triumphed.
Got wants us to be successful, and he knows that for us to be successful in this life we must be completely dependent on Him. That's why He can't just hand us success on a silver platter. He has to give us opportunity to see the potential for failure so that we will understand the power of His provision.
God has done so much for me over the years. I'm sure there is a lot of His work that I may never even know about, but there is so much that I have seen Him do. This term is no exception. There is no reason why everything should have happened as well as it did. None of it makes sense. Yet it happened. It all came together in a way that I could never plan.
Only He could have done it all. But why? Why would He do all that for me? I can tell you straight out, it isn't because I am anyone of particular importance. I am no perfect person or sinless saint. I made plenty of mistakes this term. All I can figure is that God wants me to be here, and He knows that I am incapable of success on my own. He loves me, and wants me to learn to trust Him at all time for all things.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
It's A Wonderful Strife
It's that time of year again. The time that comes twice a year, really. The time of year when I get this overshadowing feeling; the feeling that I am just about to fail every-last-one of my classes.
It happens every term. (Not failing classes, just the feeling that I'm going to fail classes.)
I have yet to fail a single class (though I have, in the past received in a class a grade that was insufficient for my major). At this stage of the game I can't afford any mess-ups. I can't take classes again. This is my last shot, and it feels like I'm going to lose.
But, again, it always feels like I'm going to lose.
It may be true that there are some areas in which I could have done much better. There are some assignments that just did not get done. There are some things that I plum didn't get to in time. It's all these little things that make me feel like everything is going to fall apart.
It is also true that there are some areas in which I have done a wonderful job. There are things I have done this term to a degree that I never would have thought possible for me. I have achieved much. I have learned much. I have grown much.
But I feel like an athlete who waited too long into the season to get things together. I am finally able to perform well, but the team has already taken too many loses. There is now no way I will make it even as far as the semi-finals. It may or may not be true, but that's how I feel.
I've come to it again. It's that time of year. It comes only twice a year, and here it is.
So, what do I do? What can I possibly do?
I keep working. I work hard. I work until I can do no more. And I trust.
I trust in Jehovah; in Jehovah-jireh (Lord will provide); in Jehovah-shalom (Lord is peace).
I repent of my laziness. I trust in the Lord. I do my best in service to Him.
If I am to succeed, it will be the Lords doing. If I am to fail, I know that I can rest in the Lord's direction for my life.
I am not dead yet. Until I am dead there will always be opportunity on this earth to serve my Lord until He comes.
Maranatha!
(Our Lord Comes!)
It happens every term. (Not failing classes, just the feeling that I'm going to fail classes.)
I have yet to fail a single class (though I have, in the past received in a class a grade that was insufficient for my major). At this stage of the game I can't afford any mess-ups. I can't take classes again. This is my last shot, and it feels like I'm going to lose.
But, again, it always feels like I'm going to lose.
It may be true that there are some areas in which I could have done much better. There are some assignments that just did not get done. There are some things that I plum didn't get to in time. It's all these little things that make me feel like everything is going to fall apart.
It is also true that there are some areas in which I have done a wonderful job. There are things I have done this term to a degree that I never would have thought possible for me. I have achieved much. I have learned much. I have grown much.
But I feel like an athlete who waited too long into the season to get things together. I am finally able to perform well, but the team has already taken too many loses. There is now no way I will make it even as far as the semi-finals. It may or may not be true, but that's how I feel.
I've come to it again. It's that time of year. It comes only twice a year, and here it is.
So, what do I do? What can I possibly do?
I keep working. I work hard. I work until I can do no more. And I trust.
I trust in Jehovah; in Jehovah-jireh (Lord will provide); in Jehovah-shalom (Lord is peace).
I repent of my laziness. I trust in the Lord. I do my best in service to Him.
If I am to succeed, it will be the Lords doing. If I am to fail, I know that I can rest in the Lord's direction for my life.
I am not dead yet. Until I am dead there will always be opportunity on this earth to serve my Lord until He comes.
Maranatha!
(Our Lord Comes!)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)